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Taking time to live the life I want to have.

Sunday, December 8th, 2019

On Friday I went out for my regular morning run. It was well below freezing. Boy I did not want to get out of bed – but look at what I would have missed if I hadn’t gone:

The morning was so clear and we looked over a fog bank right over into the Alps. A photo really can’t do it justice – it really blew me away.

I have a group of lovely friends I’ve been running with on Friday mornings since forever – certainly more than 15 years. Same time, same route, sometimes more, sometimes less of us, rain, shine and everything inbetween.

I had a couple of years recently when I really didn’t run very often. I was taking medication that gave me asthma when I ran and had also helped to pile on a few kilos – and honestly running was agony. Actually it was worse than agony – I mostly felt like I was going to die. So for a couple of years I mostly stayed at home on Fridays and felt bad about it.

Then about a year ago – I finally decided that this wasn’t a state of affairs I wanted to accept. Sometimes when it’s cold and rainy it takes a huge amount of willpower to get out there and go, but I honestly can’t think of many times when I’ve ever regretted it. Well maybe the time we gave up (the ONLY time I should add), when the foot deep uncleared snow that was drifting deeper and the ice rain full in our faces made us decide that it was just impossible….

Anyway, a year ago I went back to my doctor, found a new medication that works and although it is still hard to run at the beginning as it keeps my heart rate low, my weight is still there and sometimes I feel like I walk as much as I run, I’m out there again on Friday mornings.

I think it is all to do with the realisation that I have to actually LIVE the life I want to have. I have to stop talking about doing things and actually get up and do them. I have to do whatever I can to make things happen, to be the person I want to be and to do the things I want to do.

So now I run, even though I’m not much good at it anymore, I go to movies on my own if I want to see them and I can’t find anyone to go with, I learn new things (like this year finally learning how to make sourdough), I skip work a little early to make it to a yoga class, I take time to sit outside and smell the roses or admire the sunset.

I guess this last year I have learned to take time for me and that it’s the little steps and the little things that make a good life. If I’m always rushing I don’t take the time to appreciate the little things and all that I have.

Have a lovely Sunday!

Helen

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